Toasting N.Y.; Texans just toast

Hopefully we built some trust around the Grill Room as Week 1 went pretty much the way we thought it would.

Sure, a couple of our 90-proofers had to go to the wire to knock down divisional foes, but weren't your meanest fights always against your best buddies?

Otherwise, free drinks for Jets fans. Your team made quite an impression on our bartenders. Strictly water for the wobbly Texans, who proved they can't handle the strong stuff.

Prost!

THE STRONG STUFF

• 1 (1) Pittsburgh (98 proof, 1-0) Survived a slugfest with the rough-house Titans, but this is not the same defense without Polamalu.
  
• 2 (2) Philadelphia (97 proof, 1-0) The Eagles are every bit as nasty as we thought they were, making plays all over the field. McNabb's hurt. What else is new? And throwing the rock and trying FGs with a 4-TD lead deep in the 4th quarter will get you run from the GR. Show some manners, Andy.
  
• 3 (3) N.Y. Giants (95 proof, 1-0) This is just the 2008 squad continued. Nothing flashy, no weaknesses, but more depth.
  
• 4 (4) New England (93 proof, 1-0) This is why Tom Terrific is one of the best of all time. The O-line has some issues, though. Paltry 3.2-yd.-per-carry rushing average won't get it done.
  
• 5 (5) San Diego (91 proof, 1-0) Used to be the Raiders' slogan was, "Just win, baby." Win is about all the Bolts did here. They were pushed around by Oakland most of the night giving up 148 yds. on the ground.
• 6 (7) Tennessee (90 proof, 0-1) The Giants of the AFC.
  

WORTH A SHOT

• 7 (6) Indianapolis (85 proof, 1-0) After Wayne, Manning's targets are limited, but we like the way the Colts defense got physical against the Jags.
  
• 8 (8) Minnesota (83 proof, 1-0) If this team sticks with this winning recipe: Heavy dose of Peterson with a touch of Favre, it can go places.
  
• 9 (9) Dallas (80 proof, 1-0) Owens exits and big plays arrive -- just as Jerry thought, eh? Let's see what 'Boys do against a Giant team that won't forget to cover the deep ball.
• 10 (11) Atlanta (78 proof, 1-0) Looks like the Gonzalez signing was every bit as nifty as everybody said it was. Falcon defense completely caged the Fish's Wildcat.
• 11 (13) New Orleans (74 proof, 1-0) The GR is old-timey when it comes to its football: Defense wins championships, got it? But, geesh, just a little defense could take Brees' Saints a long way. Big test against Philly this weekend.
• 12 (16) Green Bay (70 proof, 1-0) We're still not as bonkers as many so-called experts are about this squad, but no other team deserves this spot. O-Line better patch holes.
  
• 13 (18) Baltimore (69 proof, 1-0) Underestimated Jersey Joe Flacco (26/43, 307 yds, 1 TD, 1 INT) around the GR. The dude can stand in there and flat chuck it. The Ravens proved they are certainly worth a shot, or two.
  

WATERED DOWN

• 14 (20) San Francisco (67 proof, 1-0) We like Mike even more in the GR after his upstart squad battered Cards' QB Warner, and made just enough plays to win ugly.
  
• 15 (14) Chicago (66 proof, 0-1) Cutler showed off his big arm and hit open Packer DBs repeatedly in 21-15 loss. No rest for the weenie Sunday when the No. 1 Steelers come to town.
• 16 (23) N.Y. Jets (65 proof, 1-0) Yeah, Sanchez was ultra-cool in the pocket for a rook, but Rex Ryan's defense positively buried the Texans. The Jets zoom up to No. 16.
• 17 (22) Seattle (62 proof, 1-0) QB Hasselbeck dinked and dunked the Rams to death, and RB Jones (19-117 yds.) kept the Rams' D honest. Big test coming Sunday in SF.

CHEAP STUFF

• 18 (10) Arizona (60 proof, 0-1) The GR paid respect to the NFC champs last week, and this is what it got for it. The Cards better muster a running game, or Warner might die this year.
• 19 (19) Washington (56 proof, 0-1) The Redskins are what we thought they were, and QB Campbell is who the 'Skins thought he was when they tried to trade for a QB this year.
• 20 (25) Jacksonville (53 proof, 0-1) The Jags played the Colts to the wire on the road, and lost. This could be a theme this year for a team that doesn't make big plays.

ROT GUT

• 21 (28) Denver (49 proof, 1-0) Must pay due deference to miracles in the GR.
• 22 (24) Buffalo (47 proof, 0-1) How long before T.O. starts crying?
• 23 (17) Cincinnati (45 proof, 0-1) Snatched defeat from the jaws of victory.
• 24 (26) Oakland (42 proof, 0-1) Out-gained Chargers on ground 2-to-1.
• 25 (15) Carolina (40 proof, 0-1) Last week we said: "Delhomme just seems finished to us." This is why you watch your football in the GR.
  
• 26 (12) Houston (39 proof, 0-1) This is how employees get fired at the GR. No. 12?! Bleh!
• 27 (21) Miami (38 proof, 0-1) No offense, but some dude named Bess led the WR corps.
• 28 (29) Tampa Bay (36 proof, 0-1) Actually rolled up 174 yds. on ground against 'Boys.
• 29 (31) Kansas City (34 proof, 0-1) We suppose taking the game deep into the 4th quarter against the Ravens counts for something.
• 30 (30) Cleveland (32 proof, 0-1) They are what we thought they were -- awful.
• 31 (27) St. Louis (29 proof, 0-1) Coach Spags better learn how to coach some offense quick.
• 32 (32) Detroit (25 proof, 0-1) Uh-uh, no climbing out of the cellar until you actually prove you can win a game again in the NFL.

(*) -- denotes last week's ranking.

Picks, Peterson, Pfungstadter and Polamalu

It's Football Friday in the Grill Room, but we're still cleaning up around here following this morning's dandy of an NFL season-opener.

It wasn't always pretty, but the Pittsburgh Steelers, rated No. 1 in the Grill Room's NFL 100- PROOF RANKINGS, knocked off the No. 7 Tennessee Titans, 13-10, in overtime.

It seems the only folks around these parts that weren't ready for some football were the Polizei. They'll tell you they'd rather face the Russians in winter than deal with a drunken, raucous, mostly American football crowd at 5 in the morning.

We were able to buy happiness for our neu gut freunds when we properly bribed Captain Heinrich and his gang with an all-the-Pfungstadter-they-can-drink-for-free offer. And let's get this out of the way now: Pfungstadter is the official bier of the GR.

Before setting the tables in the joint for this weekend's action, and rousting the good captain from his bier-induced coma, a quick assessment of this morning's opener brought to you by folks we mostly trust:

• CNN/SI's Don Banks tells us it's Big Ben's team this year.
• Chuck Finder leads his comprehensive notebook in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette with the latest word on all-world saftey Troy Polamalu's knee injury.
  
• Jim Wyatt of the once-great Tennessean says the Titans have themselves to blame for this morning's loss in his excellent write-up.
  

Take your pick
For informational purposes only...some picks for Week 1 action around the NFL brought to you by gangs who most likely know as much about the game as you do:
ESPN
YAHOO!
CBS Sports
FOX
bleacher report
CNN/SI

And some picks on the college football side:
CBS Sports
Sporting News

This Week's Grill Room NFL 100-PROOF lock: Minnesota over Cleveland minus-3.5.
Cleveland is a team in disarray and No. 8 Minnesota wants to show it is ready to seriously challenge for a title this year. Forget all this talk about Brett Favre and Brady Quinn. The game will be settled on the sod. The Browns ranked 28th against the run last year while the Vikings featuring Adrian Peterson (photo above) ranked fifth. Look for the Vikes to pound away on the Browns all day and leave town with a 27-13 win.

Tape it up
Apparently the No. 2 Eagles have decided to list their whole squad on the latest NFL injury report, while the New York Post's Mike Puma tells us the Jets will likely be fined big for not listing Brett Favre on last year's report.

TV Time
If you can't stop by the Grill Room, here's the college and pro football fare that's cooking on the tube this weekend:
(For our U.S. military viewers and their families overseas the games American Forces Network will be showing are in bold.)

COLLEGE:

Friday, Sept. 11
Colorado at Toledo, 9 p.m., ESPN
Saturday, Sept. 12
Fresno State at Wisconsin, Noon, ESPN
Central Michigan at Michigan State, Noon, ESPN2
Eastern Michigan at Northwestern, Noon, Big Ten Network
Iowa at Iowa State, Noon, FSN
Syracuse at Penn State, Noon, Big Ten Network
Western Michigan at Indiana, Noon, Big Ten Network
North Carolina at Connecticut, Noon, ESPNU
Duke at Army, Noon, ESPN Classic
Troy at Florida, 12:21 p.m., SEC Network
Notre Dame at Michigan, 3:30 p.m., ABC
BYU at Tulane, 3:30, ESPN2
Houston at Oklahoma State, 3:30 p.m., FSN
Louisiana Tech at Navy, 3:30 p.m., CBS CSN
TCU at Virginia, 3:30 p.m., ESPNU
Texas at Wyoming, 3:30 p.m., Versus
UCLA at Tennessee, 4 p.m., ESPN
South Carolina at Georgia, 7 p.m. ESPN2
Vanderbilt at LSU, 7 p.m., ESPNU
Air Force at Minnesota, 7 p.m., Big Ten Network
Illinois State at Illinois, 7 p.m., Big Ten Network
Kansas at UTEP, 7:30 p.m., CBS CSN
Tulsa at New Mexico, 8 p.m., Mtn.
USC at Ohio State, 8 p.m., ESPN
Purdue at Oregon, 10:15 p.m., FSN
Utah at San Jose State, 10:30, ESPNU
Oregon State at UNLV, 11 p.m., CBS CSN

NFL:

Sunday, Sept. 13
Miami at Atlanta 1 p.m., FOX
Kansas City at Baltimore 1 p.m., CBS
Philadelphia at Carolina 1 p.m., FOX
Denver at Cincinnati 1 p.m., CBS
Minnesota at Cleveland 1 p.m., FOX
N.Y. Jets at Houston 1 p.m., CBS
Jacksonville at Indianapolis 1 p.m., CBS
Detroit at New Orleans 1 p.m., FOX
Dallas at Tampa Bay 1 p.m., FOX
San Francisco at Arizona 4:15 p.m., FOX
Washington at N.Y. Giants 4:15 p.m., FOX
St. Louis at Seattle 4:15 p.m., FOX
Chicago at Green Bay 8:20 p.m., NBC

Monday, Sept. 14
Buffalo at New England 7 p.m., ESPN
San Diego at Oakland 10:15 p.m., ESPN
(All times EST)

• And finally...a wish on this the eighth anniversary of 9/11: May bin Laden's cave burn long enough to give the NYC Firefighters a chance to put it out. The staff at the Grill Room will never forget.

(Associated Press photo)